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Jalen is one of the best quote machines going. Look at that mouth!

If you want to see the full list feel free to go here. I just grabbed a few of the ones that made me laugh the most.

“What comes out of the microwave hot doesn’t always stay hot. I know, because I eat bagels in the morning.”
– Shaquille O’Neal, following the Heat’s comeback win over the Celtics

“Just because I got traded doesn’t mean we’ll be able to compete with the Spurs and Pistons right away.”
– Jalen Rose on his trade to 14-34 Knicks

“Looking back, there may have been a few things I would have done differently.”
– Former Raptors GM Rob Babcock

“I despise cool. I’ve never seen one frickin’ person who was cool who I liked.”
– Roy Williams explaining why he benched his starters Tuesday night

“In some way, Jerome [Bettis] has touched every person on this team.”
– Hines Ward

“This deal totally shifts the balance of power in the East. Now we can add the Celtics to the list of teams that UConn could beat.”
– Charles Barkley on the recent Celtics trade

“I may not be a class act, but I’m an American.”
– Ron Artest on wanting to play for the Olympic team

“By the time we got [to Detroit], it was almost 2 in the morning, because ain’t nothing open but hospitals, jails and legs.”
– Jalen Rose

“I’m telling you, Darko is a Serbian gangster. Darko’s got some bodies back there [in Serbia-Montenegro]. He can go psycho on guys.”
– Rasheed Wallace on teammate Darko Milicic

“Maybe I’ll buy a chocolate factory.”
– Andrei Kirilenko on what to buy with his new max-money contract

“I don’t see it happening unless every NBA player is given a stipend to buy clothes.”
– Marcus Camby (who will make $7.15 million this season) on the NBA invoking a new dress code

“Don’t say I don’t get along with my teammates. I just don’t get along with some of the guys on the team.”
– Terrell Owens

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